Tag Archives: Mother Teresa

Day 6: Dreaming

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Begin with the Prayer of Abandonment.

Today’s theme is “dreaming.” Our dreams can teach us many things: What we wish for, and what we fear. What we hope and what we dread. What we need and what we regret.

Several years ago my husband and I were going through a particularly trying time with the kids. Sometimes we would escape the challenges of the day by imagining where we might be in a year, in five years. Deliberately turning our minds from the potential landmines before us, we would dream together of what life would be like, where we would go and what we would do. Happily, these positive thoughts buoyed us up and got us over those rough patches. These small bits of happiness were a mercy, keeping us in hope.

mother-teresa-13If you are cut from a more pragmatic bolt of cloth, perhaps you derive your mutual sense of comfort in another way. For Mother Teresa, it was all about obedience — doing everything for love of Jesus. Every moment of the day she continually adjusted her sights not on her immediate circumstances, but on her Lord, waiting for her there in the chapel. She did not always feel his presence, but she knew with every ounce of certainty that he was there. She often quoted the assuring words of Francis de Sales, who said: “Prayer opens the understanding of the brightness of Divine Light, and the will to the warmth of Heavenly Love — nothing can so effectually purity the mind from its many ignorances, or the will from its perverse affections.”

When was the last time you dreamed (or prayed) with your sweetheart? Why not find a quiet bit of time today, and try it?

Are you finding this Lenten series helpful? Is there a friend who might like to join you on this 40 Day Challenge, to strengthen her own marriage?

Day 5: Complementarity

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Begin with the Prayer of Abandonment.

Today’s theme is complementarity. They say that “opposites attract. If you have the same gifts and strengths, one of you is superfluous.”

I watched this lived out in my parents’ marriage: Dad is a thoughtful introvert; my mother the whirlwind organizer (including their 50th anniversary celebration, pictured below, taken just a month before mom became sick). They depended on each other, truly needed each other, all their lives…. Until my father went from being the one being cared for, to the one needing to do the caring. My mother’s mental illness made this impossible after a time. Now she lives with me. And they both are suffering greatly. John and Sandy=201250

Love and suffering intertwined create the fabric from which married love is fashioned. Each shores up the other’s weakness, and leans on the other’s strengths.

This is the very picture of complementarity, to which John Paul II often referred in his “Theology of the Body.” It creates a oneness, a unity, that is expressed in many areas of marriage: God matches up penny-pinchers and generous souls; organizers and disorganized; accountants and poets. Together, we blend and wear on each other, helping each other grow in love and holiness.

How do you see this complementarity worked out in your marriage? Tell your spouse one way that the two of you are complementary to one another.

Teresa-21

 

Are you enjoying this Lenten series? Please support the effort if possible by picking up a copy of Lent with Saint Teresa of Calcutta. If you would like an autographed copy, send me a check for $15 and I’ll send one to you. My address: 10350 Royal Oak Ct., Osceola IN 46561. Thank you!

My Christian Superheroes

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Last week I had the chance to speak to a group of local women — and my mother, who had never heard me speak in public until then — about a group of women I’ve come to regard as my spiritual mothers: Women whose example led me, as surely as Moses led the Chosen People to the Promised Land, to where I am today. They (clockwise from upper left): My confirmation namesake, Amy Carmichael; Gertrude “Biddy” Chambers, widow of Oswald Chambers; Gladys Aylward; Mother Teresa; Elisabeth Elliot; and Corrie. ten Boom. (I’ve linked each of their names to my favorite books by or about them, in case you’d like to learn more.)

Like Moses, most of them did not “cross over,” as I did, into the Catholic Church (Mother Teresa is the only professed Catholic among them). And yet, each of them left an indelible stamp upon my spirit through their lives and writings.

Tonight mom and I finished reading the book about Gladys Aylward, the British missionary to China (1902-1970), whose story was retold (with great liberties) in the movie The Inn of the Sixth Happiness, starring Ingrid Bergman. After twenty years preaching the Gospel to teems of people suffering under Communist oppression, she felt the Lord call her back home. At first she was incredulous — she had by that time become a Chinese citizen, dressing like them, eating like them, even thinking like them. And yet, she said,

“England, seemingly so prosperous while other countries passed through terrible suffering at the hands of Communist domination, had forgotten what was all-important — the realization that God mattered in the life of a nation no less than in that of an individual…. I knew that I must go back to the land of my birth. I must return to do what I could to dispel the spiritual lethargy that had overtaken so many. I must testify to the great faith of the Chinese church. I must let people know what great things God has done for me” (The Little Woman, 136).

This was nearly fifty years ago, and yet not much has changed. The “underground” Church of faithful Christians continues to suffer and to struggle, and even to die.

Pray with me for the Holy Father, for the Christians in China … and for all those on the front lines, who seek to ease the suffering of the “least of these” who continue to suffer simply for naming the Blessed Name. Mother Gladys, pray for us, that we might not be afraid to stand with your beloved people.

Another much admired figure, from the Civil War era at Notre Dame, I’d like to write about one day: Sister Angela Gillespie.

On the Feast of Holy Innocents

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peek babySee, the home of God is among mortals.

He will dwell with them as their God;

they will be his peoples,

and God himself will be with them;

he will wipe every tear from their eyes.

Death will be no more;

morning and crying and pain will be no more,

for the first things have passed away.

Revelation 21:3-4

Close on the heels of Christmas joy comes a solemn feast, in which we recall the children slaughtered by Herod’s soldiers in his insatiable quest for power. Nowhere are the names of these innocents recorded for posterity. All we know is that the Church remembers them each year as martyrs, souls who suffered unjustly, and in that suffering made participants in the reign of God. In their brush with Immortality, the Word made flesh, they themselves were made immortal.

From life to death to life eternal, this is the pathway each of us has been called to walk. In the past year, thousands of souls have made that journey toward eternity, to experience a new kind of “Emmanuel, God is with us.” Perhaps you lost someone dear to you this year, too, and have experienced the truth of the words of Mother Teresa:

Death can be something beautiful. It is like going home. He who dies in God goes home even though we naturally miss that person who has gone. But it is something beautiful. That person has gone home to God.

Is there someone you need to release into the arms of God right now? Someone whose absence weighs upon your heart with longing and regret? Or do you know someone who is fighting this all-too-common human battle, and struggling to endure? If so, close your eyes and feel the prayers of your sisters in faith, who are praying for you right now. You are not forgotten. If not . . . please join in the prayer, for those in need of strength.

Saint Teresa of Calcutta, mother of the heartsick and suffering, pray for us.

heidi-2013 About the Author

Heidi Hess Saxton is a Catholic wife and adoptive mother of two teenagers, and author of Advent with Saint Teresa of Calcutta and Lent with Saint Teresa of Calcutta (Servant). This year she spent Christmas with her elderly parents and sisters, who gathered in Georgia to spend one more Christmas baking cookies with their mom, who is ready to go meet Jesus. She would appreciate your prayers.

Celebrate St. Mother Teresa at Dinner Tonight!

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mt-dinner

Today I’ll be talking with Jen Fulwiler on her radio show — if you’d like a free copy of “Advent with St. Teresa of Calcutta,” just leave a comment below about the show, and I’ll put you in a drawing for a free book!

For many people, the weeks leading up to Christmas are full of rich food, lavish parties, and mall hopping till you drop. So today I thought I’d share with you a simple vegetarian meal with flavors reminiscent of the adopted homeland of Mother Teresa, and my new book with Servant/Franciscan Media Advent with Saint Teresa of Calcutta.

Recently at our parish mission, I had a distinct sense of déjà vu. My daughter’s eyes lit up  as a middle-aged missionary (in this case, a priest) spoke in animated language about the needs of those he serves, and challenged those in the congregation to give and to go. Clearly, Sarah was eager to take up that challenge — and I offered to go with her to talk to the priest afterwards.

I’d had a similar experience when I was her age, and a missionary had come to the small non-denominational church my family and I had belonged to for years. The missionary had given a similar challenge, and my middle-school self could not wait to join the effort. After the service was done, I went up to talk to him . . . and I’ll never forget how his eyes scanned over my head, looking for older and more suitable candidates. Sadly I walked away, wondering why he didn’t want me — and promising God that he could still have me, if he wanted.

Turns out, God did. About five years later, the good people of my church rallied together to raise my support, and I spent an amazing year in Senegal, West Africa as a short-term missionary before going to work in publishing (a mission field of a different kind).

And so, when this missionary priest scarcely looked my daughter in the eye as I invited him to sit with us at lunch (he was unable to do so), I decided to take it upon myself to cultivate this hunger for missions. Last night we made a “Mother Teresa Dinner,” (the recipes have been posted on the Franciscan Media website), and talked about her life among the poorest of the poor as we made naan bread.familypicWe also talked about friends like Colleen Mitchell, a Catholic missionary who works (with her husband Greg and their children) among at-risk mothers and their children in Costa Rica, and her book
Who Does He Say You Are?

I don’t know if Sarah will wind up going to the mission field. But I want her to know that she can . . . if God wants her, and she is willing to go.

sarah

. “

8 Ways Mother Teresa Changed My Life

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mother-teresa-13In celebration of the canonization of Saint Teresa of Calcutta (Mother Teresa) on September 4, I would like to share with you eight lessons and prayers that I discovered from reading Mother Teresa’s writings. Feel free to share some of your favorites as well!

I’ve posted these lessons at the “Extraordinary Moms Network.” It was such a privilege reading through dozens of books by and about this great lady. I found myself relating to her in surprising ways! (Like me, she became “Mother” in her middle thirties, and like me she HATED getting her picture taken.)  Here are links to the eight lesson in the post series, which will run from September 4 through September 11.

Lesson #1  The Power of Loving the “Other.” How I “met” Mother Teresa while on a cross-country bus in Mexico, trying to discern my own vocation.

Lesson #2: Always Take Mary with You.  What would you do with an unlimited train pass? If you’re Mother Teresa . . . you take Mary with you.

Lesson #3: God Works Miracles When We Make Ourselves Small. The sole survivor of last year’s murderous attack of the Missionaries of Charity in Yemen remembers the miracle.

Lesson #4: God Enjoys the Simplest Prayers. Do you feel self-conscious about praying in public? Let this encourage you!

Lesson #5:  Faithful Love Sweetens Life How prayer is the “secret ingredient” of a peaceful life.

Lesson #6: God Transforms Our Pain Have you ever wondered what God was thinking when he allowed this or that to happen? Seeing how God used the pain of Mother Teresa’s life to bring healing to others spoke to me about this.

Lesson #7: God Measures “Success” Differently One day when we stand before God at the end of our lives, God will measure the value of our actions very differently than we have a tendency to do here on earth. How will you measure up?

Lesson #8: Joy, Like Love, Is a Choice. From broken hearts to natural disasters to national tragedies, how we choose to respond can be life-giving for ourselves and others.

Saint Teresa, thank you for the gift of your life to the whole world. Pray for us, your children, as we continue to follow your example of joy in suffering, trust in darkness, and humble service to all. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, Amen.

 If you are enjoying this series, you might also enjoy my two new books on her life and writings: Advent with Saint Teresa of Calcutta (preorders ship 9/16) and Lent with Saint Teresa of Calcutta, (preorders ship 1/17), both available through Servant Books/Franciscan Media.

Thanks for reading!

40-Day Challenge: Longing (Day 18)

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Begin with the Prayer of Abandonment.

Do you ever feel lonely in your marriage? I think most of us feel a bit isolated and disconnected from time to time. There have been times when I’ve wondered whether I should have stuck with my original plan (the one I was forming just before I met Craig) and joined a cloister – at least then there wouldn’t be so many socks to pick up.

What I only recently recognized was that even women religious feel this way about their Spouse – in the book Come Be My Light characterizes the life of Blessed Mother Teresa with two predominant themes: service and loneliness. This woman, who had poured out her entire life in service of the poor, even she felt a dark night of the soul that stretched on not just for days, but for years.

For married love, a memorable example may be found in the story of Abelard and Heloise. Heloise was a precocious teenager when she fell under the spell of the thirty-something troubadour-philosopher. When she became pregnant, Abelard proposed a secret marriage (secret to prevent ruining his academic career). Heloise’s uncle retaliated by announcing the union . . . then having Abelard castrated.  Heloise was sent away to have her baby, then consigned to the cloister by her beloved husband.

She went, but not happily.  The passion poured out of her (in Latin, no less) in her correspondence with her husband: “For I often come with parched throat longing to be refreshed by the nectar of your delightful mouth and to drink thirstily the riches scattered in your heart. What need is there for more words? With God as my witness I declare that there is no one in this world breathing life-giving air whom I desire to love more than you . . . “ (Heloise, Early Letters, 23, as quoted in James Burge’s Heloise & Abelard: A New Biography, 49).

To say that Abelard did not respond as she’d hoped is something of an understatement. The message was clear:  I don’t want to talk about it – that chapter is closed. In time, “the silence of Heloise” has become synonymous with strong emotions unrequited and unexpressed.

Today’s challenge:  That Heloise sure had a way with words. What would your husband do if you “borrowed” her sentiments and slipped a note in his lunch bag? (Or, if you have a pretty good memory and dramatic flair, and can pull it off without giggling, recite them one night after the kids are in bed!)

Today’s prayer: “You, O eternal Trinity, are a deep sea into which, the more I enter, the more I find, and the more I find, the more I seek. O abyss, O eternal Godhead, O sea profound, what more could you give me than yourself?”  (Catherine of Siena). 

Photo credit:  Abelard and Heloise (image by Edmund Blair Leighton)

Where has Heidi been?

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Hello!  Did you think I’d gone away?  It’s been almost a month since the last time I posted, which as you probably know is not the best thing for a blogger to do. Tends to diminish traffic considerably.

However (and I suspect many moms can relate to this), there are times when life kind of takes over and squeezes out all the “extras.” This, compounded by the fact that I’ve been dealing with some things in my own life that — until I had processed them a bit — I didn’t feel ready to write about.  Even now, I’m not sure it’s “soup yet,” but as someone pointed out to me recently, I tend to be someone who processes things best in writing. So here goes.

Some weeks ago, I met up with a young woman and her five adorable children. The “how” is less important than the fact that she and her family have gotten me thinking a great deal about how we as a society treat the poor and marginalized in our society. On the surface, “Sherry” is someone who made some bad choices early in life, which are still weighing her down.  She has no job, few resources, no car . . . and her friends and family have precious little to spare.

She loves her kids. She dresses the warmly, and feeds them even when she herself is not eating. She has shown great ingenuity in finding public resources to pay for food and shelter. But without a car, even the simplest task such as registering the children for school becomes an exercise in frustration. Her two cousins moved closer to her, to help her out . . . but neither of them has been able to find work, and one of them is still trying to get his GED.

Now for the part I’ve been trying to figure out:  What does charity (in the best sense of the word) look like in this situation? My own resources are not infinite, my time is also limited … and, as cute as they are, these children and their family are not my responsibility. So, what is the Christian response?

Surely not, “Well, she made this mess … let her clean it up herself!” (I’ve heard that one already.)

Possibly, “Let her ask you for what she needs.” (Which allows her to control her situation — but could create an unhealthy dependency.)

Possibly, “Just be a friend, and listen.” (This is easier than it sounds, when you find five children living in a trailer with empty cupboards that reeks of feral cat urine.)

This is a situation long on drama and short on answers, I know. Even as I write this, I keep coming back to the Beatitudes. “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for they shall inherit the earth.” Jesus always expressed a preference for the poor, the fatherless and the outcast. He especially loved the children.

At times like this, I wish I could sit down with Blessed Mother Teresa (our priest gave a homily about her life today, tying it in with the parable of the mustard seed and the faithful servant). When she looked around and saw those hundreds of children who could not be adequately cared for, how did she prioritize?  In a word . . . she kept her eyes on Jesus.  Each day was an opportunity to dispense moments of grace. She could not solve the problem entirely. Some could argue that she was unable even to put an appreciable dent in the need.

But oh, how she loved. “Do small things with great love,” she’d say.

Lord, let me be like that.

Miracle Monday: “Strong Women and Holy Mothers”

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mother teresa windowToday I’d like to share with you a lovely post I found over at “Happy Catholic,” who writes about Drana Bojaxhiu, the mother of Blessed Mother Teresa (patroness of foster families).

Favorite quote: 

Mother Teresa said her mother used to tell her: “When you do good, do it quietly, as if you were tossing a pebble into the sea.” That is a beautiful image of the hidden life. Of the life lived totally in the presence of God. It reminds me of what St. John the Baptist said: “[Christ] must increase, but I must decrease” (John 3:30).

Now … go and read the rest!

John Paul II and National Adoption Month!

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“Adopting children, regarding and treating them as one’s own children, means recognizing that the relationship between parents and children is not measured only by genetic standards. Procreative love is first and foremost a gift of self. There is a form of ‘procreation’ which occurs through acceptance, concern and devotion. The resulting relationship is so intimate and enduring that it is in no way inferior to one based on a biological connection. When this is also juridically protected, as it is in adoption, in a family united by the stable bond of marriage, it assures the child that peaceful atmosphere and that paternal and maternal love which he needs for his full human development.”

John Paul II, Letter to Adoptive Families (Sept 5, 2000)

November is National Adoption Month — and today,  November 15 — is National Adoption Day!! Yipee!!!

Are you looking for ways to celebrate adoption? Click here to go to an article from “Adoptive Families” magazine that offers 30 ways families can celebrate!

For more information about this important resource for adoptive parents, or to subscribe, click here!