Mommy Torture (The Things We Do For Love)

In today’s, Heather Heath Chapman’s “A musical rift between mother and daughter” had me laughing till I cried.  She writes…

Picture it: A summer concert tour. An outdoor amphitheater. I am in excellent voice tonight. When the band gears up for “How Sweet It Is (to Be Loved by You),” James Taylor looks over and gives me a lanky wave, as if to say, “Heather Heath Chapman, you are the best backup singer of all time.”

See what I mean? Cool, right?

My daughter does not think so.

Nor does she appreciate the lyrics I like to ad-lib while I’m putting away dishes or pounding raw chicken. I’m not sure what she’s complaining about, because I cover lots of the popular songs that kids are enjoying these days. For example:

(Written while preparing dinner. Sung to the tune of Hannah Montana’s “Best of Both Worlds.”)

I’ve made the WORST
Must have used too much cheese,
Hand me a trash bag, please

Not long after I crafted that little ditty, my daughter began her Hannah Montana boycott.

This kind of thing goes on at our house all the time (I realize this will come as a shock to most of you.) Just tonight I was subjecting Christopher to this particular kind of Mommy Torture. Until tonight, he’d giggle and ask for another one.

Tonight, he clasped his hands over his ears and wailed. “I can’t CONCENTRATE!!!!”

I think he must be coming down with Sarah’s 24-hour flu bug. Don’t you?

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