Today my latest column at CatholicMom.com is up, entitled “A Sober, Loving Moment.”

No matter how long you’ve been married, true intimacy is measured not in years but in sacrifice. For richer, for poorer — in sickness and in health — in freeze-dried, chocolate chip mint ice cream and a gentle covering of the afghan in the middle of the night.

We love not for what the other person does for us, but because of who we are when we are with that person. True love — the self-donating, unselfish variety — is one that gives more than it takes. It “believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” In a word, it keeps loving, no matter what.

Have you abandoned yourself entirely to your marriage?