Today was Honors Assembly at South Arbor Academy. To be honest, I almost missed it — I didn’t see the notice, and was rushing out the door to get to work on my latest deadline. But fortunately I happened to be in the building, and had time to make a choice: I made my way to the gym to sit with the other parents. The deadline would have to wait.
I shifted nervously in my seat as the children marched into the assembly. It’s silly, really, but one of my greatest struggles as a parent is letting my kids set their goals and dreams without expecting them to fulfill mine as well. Such as being at the top of their class, just as Craig and I were usually near the top of ours.
The sad thing is, we don’t always realize what we’re doing. A few weeks ago when I was visiting my parents, we talked about how much more difficult the curriculum seems to be now than when I was in school. This led to a discussion about report cards, and how I always dreaded going home if I had anything less than a “A” on my report card.
“Well, we never expected you to get all ‘A’s, Heidi. Only to do your best,” Mom insisted.
I remembered it differently. Fortunately, so did Dad. “We knew you could do it, honey. And you never disappointed us. We were always so proud of you.”
His words echoed in my heart again as I sat in the bleachers. Last term had been difficult, both in terms of academics and “moral focus” (the ability to control themselves and focus on their work). But this was another term, and we were all getting another chance.
This time, both kids made the honor roll! Hurray! I smiled and waved, elated that they had won this recognition — and overjoyed that I had been there to share their moment.
These next few weeks will bring other milestones as well. Christopher’s First Holy Communion. Sarah’s learning to sleep in her own bed. The pool goes up again, and before long we’ll be adding another member to our family (the four-footed, tail-wagging variety). In September Sarah starts first grade. And time keeps marching on.
Like many moms, I continue to juggle multiple hats: wife, mother, editor, writer, speaker, church volunteer. And, like many moms, I don’t always make the “honor roll.” As I type this, I can see the chair full of laundry that needs folding and putting away; the kitchen floor desperately in need of a scrub. For the moment, I’ve set those things aside.
Today I’m taking time to enjoy my children … and make them as proud of me as I am of them.
Such a wonderful post and beautifully written 🙂 This is why you’re such an inspiration. I’m sure many moms struggle with this too. Congrats to both your children for making the honor roll and for all the upcoming milestones that lie ahead 🙂 Enjoy your day!
This really touches me, Heidi. (I shouldn’t comment; it shows just how SADLY behind I am on this blog!) I felt that way about my parents’ expectations of me as well…and I struggle to balance between setting an expectation level for my kids that I know they can reach (not letting them “get away” with sluffing off) vs. not pushing them so hard they burn out…Thankfully, they’re still little… 🙂